Archive | What the fuck!

Superb parking skills

This Barbie Hummer was spotted at Le Mall parking occupying not just one, but two handicapped parking spaces. Way to go missy!

Photo via Joya Selwan

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Video footage of money changer stabbed in Saida

Al-Jadeed TV showed this video footage of the crime that took place in Saida on Monday. A 22 years old Syrian guy killed Mohammad Natout by stabbing him in his money exchange shop and then escaped stealing $5,000 from the drawers. He was fortunately arrested by the security forces few hours while attempting the flee the country.

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Alfa Sunday promotion

Alfa’s latest promotion is more like imposing a ridiculous entrance fee at a discount store. Why should people pay $1/week to benefit from a 40% discount on local calls during Sundays?!

Knowing that a minute costs $0.36 for prepaid users, you’ll be saving $0.144 for each minutes, and therefore you will have to speak a minimum of 7 minutes to cover that $1 you initially have paid ($1/$0.144=6.94), so you won’t start really saving until after you have spoken the 8th minute.

Bravo Alfa! Keep the good promotions coming!

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The Lebanese parliament “love” stories

You really have to check this article published yesterday in Al-Akhbar about the way some of our MPs sexually harass female reporters at the parliament and even chase them to their apartments at midnight!

هناك في المجلس النيابي نواب يؤدّون دور كازانوفا. واحد من كتلة المستقبل العكارية. ثانٍ من الكتلة نفسها. ثالث مستقبليّ كوراني. مازح الأخير إحدى الزميلات مرة حين علم أن موعد زواجها قريب قائلاً إن لديه «مكتباً خاصاً للاستشارة والتدريب»، وضرب على صدره مردداً: «أنا بعجبك بها القصص». رابع جبيليّ عونيّ؛ يحرص عند استقباله امرأة «على تزليطها» بعينيه كما كان يقول مرة في مجلس خاص. خامس زغرتاوي، هو زميل الرابع في الكتلة نفسها، أدلى بدلوه في الموضوع نفسه خلال الجلسة الحميمية نفسها، فرأى أن «الرجل الذي تمر أمامه امرأة ولا يطارد مؤخرتها بعينيه، ليس رجلاً». وتروي إحدى الصحافيات أن هذا النائب كان قبل سنوات ضمن وفد سياسي يزور إحدى الدول القريبة، وكانت المرأة الوحيدة على متن الطائرة، فتهامس مع زملائه خمس دقائق ثم اقترب منها بقميص غالبية أزراره مفتوحة، ليسألها عما تنوي فعله برفقتهم، ملامساً ركبتها بركبته. السادس في الفرقة بيروتي قح، قال لأحد الصحافيين المشكوك في هويتهم الجنسية مرة: «إن كنت لا تريدني، فاترك لي المصور أو مسؤول الإضاءة». السابع في الفريق بيروتي أرمني أسدل ستائر مكتبه قبيل وصول الصحافية وخفف الضوء، قائلاً «جهزت الغرفة لتكون أكثر رومانسية». فنصحته بالذهاب عند زوجته وغادرت. ثامن الكازانوفات، من إقليم الخروب. التاسع من صور. والعاشر من بنت جبيل. أما البقاع الغربي، فينافس البقاع الأوسط، لكل منهما «جَغَلان» على الأقل. «القانون صورتكم» تقول حملة «كفى عنف واستغلال». وكان يجب أن تضيف: «ما بتِشبعوا!؟».

What is really remarkable though, is that some of the mentioned MPs are actually members of the parliamentary committee responsible for drafting new laws addressing domestic violence!

The article mentions at the end that sometimes it’s not all the MP’s fault, as some reporters also work hard to seduce some MPs, and one of them succeeded to seduce two members of the same parliamentary bloc at a time! Which of course called for the head of the bloc to intervene.

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7assesneh Inne Rkheesa

WARNING: RATED R

An “unserious parody”? WTF! That’s like getting naked in the street to take a stand against nudity!

7assesneh Inne Rkheesa is a lebanese unserious parody song written by Moe & Shonda and recorded vocally by the legendary lebanese diva, Shonda during the first week of November 2011 To the melody of the instrumental version of Katy Perry’s ET (extra terrestrial).

It was written to highlight the wide spread of the unethical and illegal social phenomena that has been the reason behind the broadcasting visual images of moving objects with exposed flesh, voices that sound like hairballs stuck in a cat’s throat, and music that unfortunately slows down the functioning of the human brain cells. The song was introduced with the melody of the song Extra terrestrial (ET) by katy perry due to its catchy beat and rythm. It was recorded two days after it was written. Ever since, it has been among the playlists of DJs in pubs, ipods, and phones around the city. a Crowd of communication arts students offered to shoot a music video staring the vocalist herself, for the priceless charisma she acquires and the powerful effect she projects within the song .

One of the Saint Joseph University (beirut) students was impressed with the piece and contacted the New Tv broadcasting company who offered Shonda an interview on its comedy show “chi nn” to discuss the art of “7assesneh enne rkheesa” and spread the message of Rokhos to all generations. But she had to turn down the interview due to severe circumstances.

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People fainting at Nefaa

Here’s what you get when everyone (including myself) postpone paying their mecanique fees till the end of December. Some people fainted while waiting in lines today!

Regardless of how crowded the place is, the corruption you get to witness there is guaranteed to cause you a heart attack while waiting.

Source

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